We’ll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;
but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;
yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
why shouldn’t the plural of pan be called pen?
If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,
and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
why shouldn’t the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
but though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.

Some other reasons to be grateful if you grew up speaking English:

- The bandage was wound around the wound.
- The farm was used to produce produce.
- The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
- We must polish the Polish furniture.
- He could lead if he would get the lead out.
- The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
- Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to
present the present.
- At the Army base, a bass was painted on the head of a bass drum.
- When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
- I did not object to the object.
- The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
- There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
- They were too close to the door to close it.
- The buck does funny things when the does are present.
- A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
- To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
- The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

(Anonymous)

I pressed “pause” on my life for a short while yesterday to take time to sit with my 85 year old grandpa, Mr. Everett H. Jones. I stopped in for a visit that ended up lasting over 3 hours. It was nice to reminisce and talk about the past. We shared stories about family, travels, food, doctors, and just about every other topic that came to mind. I enjoyed myself tremendously.

Dear Mr. Gardner,

I heard that you are retiring and I wanted to take a moment to congratulate you on a long and meaningful career. I know firsthand the influence that you have had on many young minds and wanted to express my appreciation to you.

I attended your fifth grade GATE class at Benito Juarez in 1986. I remember that was the year because the Angels lost to the Red Sox in the American League pennant race and you cried into your tie. The Series that year went to the Mets after the ball squirted through Buckner’s legs…but I digress.

I remember we were at the far end of the school building on the outside corner. I remember our President reports, writing our own “novels”, Weather boxes, and PE. I also remember that was my first year in GATE after coming out of Mrs. Whittaker’s regular 4th Grade class. You called me a “superstar” in front of my parents once and that encouraging compliment has stuck with me throughout my life. I remember the play we performed and have had some fun reconnecting with my classmates over Facebook. If you are interested, I am sure that you can find a bunch of former students on there.

I went on to South JHS and then on to Servite High School, then UCLA. I moved to Northern California in 2002 and am now married with a 2 year old daughter.

Congratulations again, and enjoy retirement!

Today I learned of the existence of yet another Matt Ellis. Apparently he is an employee of Provident Funding out of Southern California. Funny to think that there are two of us in California, working in the same industry! It made me think of an idea – for a movie. It will be called The Matt Ellis and it will be a snapshot out of the lives of all these different guys, all named Matt Ellis, living in the modern age. I will need to assemble a team of support to see if this idea is something that I can get off the ground. More to come!

I had a breakthrough this morning on the internet connection at my place – it has been very unstable and frustrating. It is not DSL or Cable (we live out in the boonies and those services are not available). Our high speed connection is a high frequency radio setup. Anyway, it has been flickering off and on, and this has been an ongoing problem for the last couple of weeks. I have been concerned that I have been causing the issue somehow. I called the service provider again this morning and spoke with the support tech. We have spoken several times and have been working together, racking our brains as to why this has become such a problem – There never had been service issues prior to us living here. He reassured me that the problem couldn’t have been my fault – the antennae and the tower were having issues with the stability of the signal.

Anyway, we found what I believe is the culprit…(drum roll please!)…the baby monitor! We have a camera and receiver setup in Gemma’s room and it works on 900mhz – the same frequency that the internet uses. Apparently they were fighting for available space in the airwaves. I am stoked because this has been a source of frustration. How did we ever function prior to the internet? It was so funny after having gone back and forth and pulling our hair out and upgrading our antennae and everything…the tech asked this morning: “Do you guys have a baby monitor?” and the lightbulb went off.

Needless to say, I am happy (and productively working) this morning!

Being a daddy is so much fun. Gemma delights me on a daily basis by growing or changing in small ways. She is 18 months old. Yesterday, 4/18/11, she started to sing a little number that I greet her with every morning when she wakes. She has never previously acknowledged this in any way, but she has obviously absorbed it. I started taking the video because of her singing, but it kept evolving into cuteness, so I had to post. If I would have known this was coming, I would have wiped her face (please excuse the booger-nose profile visible at 0:10) She is a little chatterbox and is very busy, as you can see by how quickly her attention span changes in the course of just one minute. (She even fits in a mini-tantrum!) One of her favorite things to do is to “draw a circle” using a pen/crayon/pencil and paper and scribbling to her heart’s content. She sees some paper on my desk and begins to ask. When I prompt her to say “please”, she switches gears and asks me to dance. We dance on a daily basis around here too, so it isn’t surprising to me that she would ask, but it does make me smile when SHE asks ME to dance.

The world would would like to welcome Mr. Sawyer Everett Ellis, son of my brother Chad and his lovely wife Shanda. He was born at 3:02 pm this afternoon. He weighed in at 7lbs. 2 oz. and was 19 7/8 inches.

I was reading through an old journal that I kept in high school and found this entry from 1/18/1994:

“To me, the most astounding fact in the universe, even more astounding than the flight of the Monarch butterfly, is the power of mind which drives my fingers as I write. Somehow, by natural processes still totally mysterious, a million butterfly brains working together in a human skull have the power to dream, to calculate, to see and to hear, to speak and listen, to translate thoughts and feeling into marks on paper which other brains can interpret. Mind, through the long course of evolution, has established itself as a moving force in our little corner of the universe.

It appears to me that the tendency of mind to infiltrate and control matter is a law of nature. This infiltration will not be permanently halted by any catastrophe or any barrier that I can imagine. If our species does not choose to lead the way, others will do so, or may have already done so. If our species is extinguished, others will be wiser or luckier.

Mind is patient, mind has waited for 3 billion years before composing its first string quartet. It may have to wait another 3 billion years before it spreads all over the galaxy. I do not expect that it will have to wait so long. But, if necessary, it will wait. The universe is like a fertile soil spread out all around us, ready for the seeds of mind to sprout and grow. Ultimately, late or soon, mind will come into its heritage.” -Professor Freeman Dyson

I found this to be very interesting.  What do you think? Please feel free to comment.

Hi there.  Liz and I have just finalized our decision to move to Wolfcrest Ranch.  The Ranch is a 6.38 acre property located between Auburn and Grass Valley.  We are excited to start the next chapter in our lives and are busy planning a remodel and decor for our new digs!

Here is a rough 3D floorplan that I built in Google SketchUp: